My great great great grandmother Rauti married an Englishman in Foxton in the late 1800s. Together they had five children. That was after she had already endured the long heke (migration) South with her Ngati Raukawa people. They had migrated to add their strength in numbers to their kin, Te Rauparaha and Ngati Toa, who were seeking new land as skirmishes with Northern tribes drove them out. Now, it was them driving others out.
The battles and politics were not just Maori against Maori - they needed to navigate new relations with Pakeha colonisers too. So Rauti was married to my great great great grandfather, Henry Morshead Symonds and began breeding half-castes, who bred quarter-castes, who bred eighth-castes, and so on. At least, that's how Pakeha talk about it. In numbers and amounts. Quanta of blood.
Anyway, further down the line there came me. In between times, Rauti separated from Henry, travelled (by foot again?) with her eldest daughter Mere all the way back to the Waikato and settled there again in Raukawa tuturu (true Raukawa!) territory. A few generations later my Dad was born down the road in Putaruru, my Mum was born down another road in Matamata, they met each other at Waikato university, and - another heke later - together they had me. In London (but not for long).
I grew up Pakeha until my Dad started sending me copies of my whakapapa (genealogy), and I started searching online for my hapu (subtribe), my marae (home grounds). And all the paths led to Rauti. Rauti, whose journeys seem filled with suffering. Rauti, who I heard calling me until one day I found myself at the urupa (burial ground) near Pikitu (my marae), standing at the foot of her grave. A small stone marker with the one word, 'Rauti', etched into it. And a long story, told me by my newfound auntie Tont. Maybe she was buried under this stone. Or maybe she was South, with her other family, the ones she left behind to bring us home again. But a story told the Maori way. 'She's here, of course she is. She's ours. Those others can say what they like, but we know. She's with us.'
And I listen to Rauti still, as I find myself breeding half-castes or quarter-castes or sixty-fourth-castes -depending on how you count - who are also whole beautiful numberless creatures. I listen to Rauti as I journey and keep seeking the right home for all of us. I listen and I know. She's with us.
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